Living Inside the Box

For me, breaking the cycle was easy. I don't remember it being a conscious decision to "Just Say No" to drugs, it was just something inside me. Fear of becoming an addict was always in the back of my mind and I knew you can not become a drug addict if you never try drugs. Recently I was talking with a couple woman. One being my mom, a recovering addict, and the other my mom's friend. We were talking about how some people live their lives inside the box and others live outside the box. I expressed how I was a little envious of those who dared to live outside the box. Some times I feel self conscious of the fact I've never done drugs, including pot, or even smoked a cigarette. I feel like maybe I'm looked at as being a bit boring. I even lived in another country for a while, where nobody knew me. I wanted to create a different person like I wanted to get a tattoo and try weed and live a life of a girl in her early 20's trying to figure out who she is BUT the craziest thing I did was cut my hair! I have always lived "inside the box". As I was talking to the 2 women I was interrupted by my mom's friend and she said "You had to live inside the box to make up for the fact your parents didn't". That was an "Ah Ha" moment for me. She's right. I had to create my own stability. Every child needs stability and some have to create their own.